Renae by Kaylin R. Frost

The story of Anxiety and Depression. Based on a true story.

Author Note: Some of the following scenes in the beginning may not be suitable for some readers. This is a work of fiction and thus any perceived viewpoints are an are not affiliated with Anacortes Highschool. Viewer discretion is advised.

The sky was clear with clouds the shape of flowers and hearts, with some the shape of cats or horses. Some were white as the Heavens itself, some were pink and yellow from the sun setting. It was never night, nor day. Always dusk or dawn. Wind blew, but only enough to give a breeze. The trees were filled with leaves green as springtime, her mother’s voice soft and sweet. Nearby rivers and streams were filled with aquatic creatures, big and small. Mother nature was beautiful.

This was the mindset of little Renae. She kicked her legs under her desk as she learned about Sacagawea, the girl who helped Lewis and Clark. One day, Renae wanted to help people young and old. One day, she would explore.

“Renae?” The teacher asked, and Renae snapped back to the classroom, back to the lesson, back to the excitement. Her eyes wandered to the teacher’s board, reading it silently under her breath. The handwriting was messy.

The sky shook with thunder, the rain pounding against the window. The distant lightning lit up the sky. Branches scratched the window as leaves ran away from the wind. Clouds dark as a void seemed to go on forever. Voices lost in the wind seemed to scream her name. Rain poured down, causing the nearby rivers to flood. Mother nature destroys everything in her path.

This was the mindset of young Renae. Her fingers twitched and her foot tapped. The teacher was talking, Renae was listening, but she couldn’t make out the words. Egyptian names flooded her head, making her stomach curl. She thought about what it would be like to go back in time, back when she was little.

“Renae?” She heard her teacher call. Renae looked at the teacher, wondering what she missed. “Can you tell me who the god of the Egyptian underworld was?” He asked, and her stomach filled with dread. Her eyes wandered to the guy next to her, she couldn’t mess this up.

While the sky is filled with storms and the land is gone, there‘s a sea of sorrow. Rain is filling the sea with hate and poison. You can’t see the clouds, as they blend with the dark black sky. The angel on her shoulder was gone, replaced by Satan himself and his son on the other. Mother nature was no longer in control.

This is the mindset of Renae. Her breathing became short and slowed, her feet dragging her across the long concrete leading to her first period. She moved in, setting her father’s guitar down. She plucked some strings, her mind becoming Satans’ underpants. She wanted to get rid of the voices, demanding for it to end.

“Renae? Are you okay?” Her friend asked, and eyes started to wander to the girl, thinking how pretty she was. Renae thought that was messed up of her.

The weather would be on and off, rain and some clouds to some clouds and sun. The sky would be blue mixed with clouds, the shape of the globs she would draw on her papers. The grass on her large island shall bright green, like springtime. Her small cabin will be full of her treasured things, like Dino-Bill (or Dino for short), the dragon/dinosaur plushie her friend gave her. It would always be mid afternoon, the sun high. There will an angel on her right side, Satans’ son rarely appearing. Mother nature would be once again beautiful.

This is the future of Renae’s mindset. Her breathing would be moderate most of the time, sometimes it would slow down, but she would name 5 things she can see, 4 things she can touch, 3 things she can smell, 2 things she can smell, and 1 thing she could hear. She would be singing along to the songs on the radio on her way to her rebuilt Grandmother’s House, to spend Christmas with her family. 

“Renae?” Her mom would ask her on the way there. “Are you doing alright?” And Renae would respond with a nod and 4 words. “Yes, I’m feeling better.” Her mother would nod and laugh. The family would open the door, Renae’s grandmother would hug her close and kiss her cheeks several times.

“Well, hello Sugar Renae!” She would say, Renae’s family would surround her with love and greetings.

For now though, to make that dream a reality, Kaylin would have to take it, one day at a time. One foot in front of the other, Dino-Bill by her side.

The End. . . 

Just The Beginning. . . 

Kaylin Frost

--She/Her-- --Junior--

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